Mother Knows Best: My First Expert

Three years back, I had my daughter and with her arrival all my smothering mothering instincts appeared to the surface. Today, after three years of on the job training, I think I am an expert at being a parent, and no one can tell me otherwise. 

Like every mother in the world, I try to do what’s best for my child. 

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Pretty sure I am. Help, mom!

It’s a tough job, being a mother! And with each lesson and every chapter, the one thing that’s constantly on my mind is – Hats off to my mom for everything she did for me, for everything she taught me and for everything that I am today. And I am now beginning to see her point from all those years back, which is a miracle in itself for every unruly kid. I’m turning into my mom! Strange – but true story, bro!

All things my mother ever said and did that the young me dismissed as her being ‘too emotional‘ or ‘too stubborn‘ or even ‘too boring‘ – are exactly the things I am now saying and doing myself. I am even using her phrases that used to drive me mad in my teenage years, or make me giggle. I am becoming my mother simply because I am a mother myself now, and hey, The Mother Knows Best! (Yes, that’s one of those phrases and I fully back it up now)

Sooner or later, we all quote our mothers.– Bern WIlliams

How right you are, Mr.WIlliams! Now that I have a daughter, I think back on all that mom used to say to me when I was young and recall my stupid reactions, and I want to immediately have a meltdown. Seriously, I don’t think I can handle my daughter growing up! I am absolutely sure I will use all my matriarchal might and main to stop her from doing anything “grown up” – like dating, or going to parties. And my kind husband reminds me that it is impossible, while patting my back understandingly. But whatever the case, I am sure my mom will be there to help out and be my partner in wondering what next.

My Mother My Friend

My mom is an extremely strong lady and all I am today, and everything I hope to be one day, is all because of her. She was my first role model, managing the house and the kids and a full time bureaucratic job that sounded pretty daunting at the time. She was my first best friend, and this is the best advice she’s given me on motherhood when my daughter was born:

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Today, I live my life claiming to be an expert on more things than it should be legal, seeking out experts in every field of life – from an expert pre-school for my toddler (yes, laugh all you want!), to an expert hairdresser (What? hair is important stuff dude!). 

But my first expert was my mom. 

I didn’t know it at that time, but she was also right about everything. 

Apart from the unquestionable logic I learned from my mom, the ‘Because I Said So, That’s Why‘ kind, and the one liners that I now repeat thrice daily, the ‘When I Was Your Age‘ kind – there is a lot more I’ve learnt from my First Expert, My Mom. For example, my love for reading and my talent for stealing books, is no secret to this blog. The young me was famous in my young-circle for reading a lot, and my love for it is one of my favorite things about myself. I love that I read so much! And you know what? My mom passes her love for reading to me.

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I do not cook. Well, actually, I do not like to cook. Except baking fancy stuff and making pasta of all kinds, I detest cooking the regular chapati-dal-rice routine. As a child, not even once did my mom said to me that I need to know how to make round chapatis. Never! Instead, she was visibly happy if I refused to help her in the kitchen and picked up a book to read. She was happy that I was doing something I loved. Or maybe she was happy not to have the exact-opposite-of-a-helping-hand in the kitchen, I’m not going into details here, but the point is – she was happy to let me read or dance or paint or pretend-to-study instead of being in the kitchen. She hated the “Girls Needs Cook” bulls#@t and I’m so glad she did!

The list of thing my mom taught me like an expert can go on till another month, but I’ll wrap this up with the final and probably the BEST thing she taught me – the gift of humor, the lesson of being able to laugh at myself.

All of us women need to maintain a sense of humor about all thing in life, especially motherhood, because without it, we may end up institutionalized or at the least, sad and unhappy. 

And who wants that, right? I am happy and laughing almost all the time. Even in the darkest and bleakest and the most embarrassing of situations, you will find me laughing hysterically. And this, I think, is a blessing. 

Laughing together in silly things is our superpower, mom!
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So, finally – Thanks for everything mom, you were my First Expert, and you always will be. Like I always say, I love you mom! I know you’re going to say ‘Love You More’ and okay, just for this once, I will admit that you are right – I knows you love me more because hey, Mother Knows Best!

A Gift for My Mother - Blog
My first lesson to my daughter will be this because MOTHER KNOWS BEST!

Post Author: Aditi Mathur Kumar

Author. Traveller. Blogger. Talker. Eavesdropper.

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