Being too nice is SO not me – Yes, that’s my starting line.I’m someone who is always real (at least I try!) and was previously known for misbehaving. I have admitted a lot of times that there are times when I not only enjoy being bitchy, but I feel supremely healthy. Seriously, you have to trust me on this – being a little bitchy really does wonders to your health.
And I totally love my health, obviously. I’d rather make fun and giggle and gossip, than make an herculean effort at being too nice to please people.
But adult life has quite a many glitches (I hate adult life!) and there are a lot of times when one HAS to put up a face and BEHAVE. Lately the same has been happening to me.
People sharing my dessert on the pretext of ‘just tasting’ , sipping from my drink because they want to ‘try’ it, requesting me to step down the treadmill in between my run because they have ‘kids waiting at home’ and people telling me very fake-polite way how they find it strange that I am always giggling. For a long time, I just smiled, nodded or and said something lame lie ‘Sure’ or ‘why not’ or ‘Lucky Me!’ – but now I’m growing tired of all this fake congeniality.
It drains me out.
So I’ve started substituting all the fake over nice-ness with my real reaction to things – I now say whatever the bloody hell comes to my mind. I do! Of course I’m not advocating out right rudeness – I’m just reminding myself and you that it isn’t mandatory to be nice all the time.
I mean, we aren’t all here to win Miss Congeniality, are we?
(If you said yes, please read the next blog. You’re SO not my TA.)
And if your answer is no, then we’re on the same page darling. We are taught from the very beginning that being nice is the right thing to do, but it’s time for new life lessons. I know the pain of feigned nice-ness and useless friendliness for people who don’t deserve it. God knows I do!
So, is being nice making you sick too?
Bitch it up a bit, I say!
Being Too Nice is bad for you.
Here are a few of my inspirational examples, in case you want motivation.
When someone at the gym asked me – for the fourth time in a week – to step down from the tread mill because she is ‘only waiting to finish her run here and leave urgently for home’ – I told her with a mock polite tone that as strange as it might sound, I have a home too! ‘Sorry honey,’ I said, ‘Maybe you can run back home?’ And then I shoved the iPod ear plug in my ears and continued to run.
Sure, she gave me a long evil look, but she went away. ‘Went away’ is the key point here. She didn’t bother me anymore. I can forget about her worrying me in the gym again because for her, I’m the ‘Rude Bitch’ now. Whatever, peace has a price and maybe this is it. I’m cool with it.
At an amazing showroom where I was the first in the line for the changing room and a girl came up saying she has ‘just one item’ to try on and can she ;have a go’ before me, I blinked twice and said “I’m sorry babe! But why don’t you go ahead and pick some more items while I ‘have a go at it’?”
She got the point and stood in the line after rolling her eyes at me. I gave her a wide grin and a thumbs up. I took 5 extra minutes then, casually relaxing inside the changing room, humming the Gladiator theme.
At a party, when an acquaintance asked if it was okay if she took a sip from my drink because she was an out and out ‘Vodka with Orange Juice’ girl but wanted to taste my Cosmopolitan – I took a deep breath and said, “Oh sure, go ahead! Oh, but I think I’m coming done with something.” I paused and coughed a little, “Is Swine Flu still a big thing?” I asked. She left me alone for the rest of the evening, thankfully.
And last but the most-important-to-me thing is when someone has the balls to tell me that I giggle too much. So, um, I giggle, okay. But how dare some random moron point it out like its a bad thing? Totally unacceptable. In such situations I suggest you just say the meanest, the most evil thing that comes to your mind. Really. I mean, last I checked, being happy was a good thing, no?
In a world where I’m-depressed-today seems to be the most used phrase, a happy person who laughs so much it makes you feel silly and laugh it up a bit too, is a bloody good thing! And it’s not like my giggling is someone else’s bloody business anyway.
Here’s what happened to me during my Business School years -A guy who I knew as a pathetic someone who was the backup-boyfriend to a batch-mate who already had a 7 year long boyfriend who once came to the college to bash this guy up (yes, things like this happen!) was staring at me in the class.
“What?” I asked.
“Why are you always giggling? Jesus!” He said to me, looking mighty annoyed.
His insult hit me like a slap in the face. It felt bad, and just plain wrong. I wouldn’t have said it to anyone. I felt a silence descend on the the class room, all eyes on me.
So I recovered from the initial shock, threw my hair back, smiled brightly and said – “Really? I wonder why? Maybe because I’m not scared of my girlfriend’s REAL boyfriend beating me up every time I step out of the college? Hmph? Or is it because I have no real friends to giggle or laugh with? What do you think it is, huh?”
Mean, but I said it. Took a lot of nerve, but I did it. The entire class fell into a hysterical laughter-fit and he got back to focusing on the white board. I know I was mean, but he literally begged for it. Served him right, right?
And that, dear reader, was the beginning of my not-so-niceness. I discovered that being too nice when you’re not feeling like it, adds to your stress. And who needs more stress, huh? WHO?
So there you go, take inspiration from me and just stop being too nice-y nice. It ain’t worth it. For your health and other good things I don’t have time to list here, BITCH IT UP!