I moved your damn cheese!

What is with these self help books? Or those stupid philosophy novels? Who are the people who are buying them in the first place? Aaarrrggh!!!

Relax. Okay. I’m in control. I’m alright. But what the hell? I got a book as a gift last evening *No, not from a guy but from my mom’s friend-trust my ability of being single throughout my blessed life* and since then I am irritated.

Not that I don’t like reading. Of course I do. Everybody does! Normally I read almost everything I can lay my hands on – and I’ve been accusing myself of being rather tasteless on this sensitive issue of books. When everyone around you is having opinions – and mind it – more than one opinion on books (like “its an ammmmmazing read dude, but you got to be really in a mood to read or you’ll hate it.” And “read this killer book at a slow pace, take atleast 2 months, else you wont understand it.” Along with “Read this one when you are looking for the reason for your existence, you’ll instantly know, but never start this when you are happy with the way things are with you”), you feel like a fool because even you looooove reading and even you have spent many nights with books, spent your tiny pocket money on them and still – most important- you have one only one opinion about book – for you they are either good or bad. See? This is what makes me feel completely stupid and definitely low brow – and I completely hate this! *sigh* What is it with people anyway?

And the books that I completely hate are, as I mentioned above- clumsy philosophy and self help claims. eeekk! That’s another reason for feeling like a dodo- not only I don’t understand them but me oh-so-much-hates ‘em all.

And they are everywhere. I stepped inside a book store and all around were various self help books or “The Alchemist” kinds. One moment please ladies and cruel men – Let me declare this here, in public interest, that I truly madly deeply dislike Paulo Coelho. Except for his “Eleven Minutes” which I liked, yeah…kind of. I was shocked to see that the biggest section in LandMark, Gurgaon is for self help books! And was stupidly the most crowded as well. I guess it is a fad, a trend that everyone is following blindfolded. Anyway. If I go back in time, I guess Shiv Khera’s “You Can Win” was the first such book I noticed – I was in junior school that time. I liked it tough; it had various stories…hahahaha. Bulbul – A friend of mine borrowed it from me and never returned it back…Damn you Bulbul! – You should return things that you borrow. How is Pune though? I heard that unlike Delhi, the weather there is always pleasant…huh? But I don’t think that’s possible…liars! Yeah, I borrowed it too from …can’t remember who. Anyway, coming back to the topic, I just hate hate hate these silly books! My stroy is that almost everyone around me knows my passion for reading and 94% of the times I get books as gifts, which is great and nice and cool 68.8% of the times. But the rest % of the times– can’t calculate it, my math sucks – is sheer disappointment of getting such no-brainers, that turns into irritation that turns into anger that turned into this post. Not that I expect a consensus on this post, infact I am ready to face the disagreement, but at least friends who read this will know. And future friends – maybe a cute-intalli-gentle-boyfriend? Wow! – will know too. And then it still is monologue, right? *Wicked smile*

And I have promised myself to give away all such books I have – lying in that old dusty bag – to friends who want them and can in turn explain to me the art of having multiple opinions on a book. I can even offer you coffee and cookies at my new found place of peace, my house. You’re welcome. Oh, did I forget to mention the names of such books in my collection? Here you go – “The Alchemist who sold his Ferrari”, “The Monk Decides to Die”, “Tuesdays with Veronica”, “Count your heads before they break” and “7 Steps to Fearless Freaking Speaking”. Or something close to these…

Anyone game?

Update: I’m in my new house! hurrey! I feel like a queen living in her palace overlooking the Sahara Mall – Odyssey to be exact. The amazing lazor beams dance on my wall opposite the bed at night, more so on weekends. Next weekend when I go to Odyssey, maybe I can try and locate my house from the top. 🙂 Thank for your lovely wishes friends. You have a happy blogger here now. 😀

Post Author: Aditi Mathur Kumar

Author. Traveller. Blogger. Talker. Eavesdropper.

43 thoughts on “I moved your damn cheese!

  • Sri Tatsat Mishra

    (October 11, 2007 - 12:23 pm)

    Now this is a Good one !! Congrats on owning the “princess” feeling again…

  • Sri Tatsat Mishra

    (October 11, 2007 - 12:25 pm)

    Ohh wait.. did I mis-spell “Queen” as “princess” ?? Well,I apologize for taking so a little younger than you actually are..Hope you would Forgive me :P..Nice work !!

  • Longroads

    (October 11, 2007 - 1:52 pm)



    I dont like them either. Maybe we are an intelligent variety 😉

  • J

    (October 11, 2007 - 1:54 pm)

    Hmmm.. quite an interesting take on books. I never quite liked ‘You can win’ but all said and done the Alchemist sure made an interesting read.

    So, where are the pics of the new house lady??

  • akanksha

    (October 11, 2007 - 1:57 pm)

    i hate self selp books too..just dont understand how a book can help someone who does not want to help himself in the first place. Monk was a disapponitment to me but somehow i loved the alchemist.

    Congrats for the new sweet home:-)

  • Adi Crazy

    (October 11, 2007 - 2:01 pm)

    Sri: Thanksssssssss *wide grin* your previous comment on the other post made me think a lot. 🙂

    Sri again: yeahhhhhhhhhh 😀 QUEEN.

    Long Raod: hehehe…I cant agree less. *wink*

  • Adi Crazy

    (October 11, 2007 - 2:05 pm)

    J: “You can Win” was in school time – a change from Sheldons and Archers of the world 🙂
    Pictures..oh yes…will follow soon. Lemmi clear my mess first 😛

    Akanksha: Hehehehe…I know about Monk. He should have lost his memory infact, atleast that hell of a book would’nt have come at all then 😛

    Thanks about the house. It is really nice. I watch TV till 1 am everyday now. 🙂

  • Anonymous

    (October 11, 2007 - 2:06 pm)

    Great post. Infact I like all the books by Paulo. But I love your take on them. Nice work.

  • Pritha

    (October 11, 2007 - 2:31 pm)

    I agree!

  • (¯`•._.•[Raaji]•._.•´¯)

    (October 11, 2007 - 5:52 pm)

    well i understand your point of view. but we need to respect others too. if self-help books doesn’t work for you, that doesn’t mean they are no help at all.
    I guess we all work differently 🙂

  • bluecoffemug

    (October 11, 2007 - 7:07 pm)

    gud post adi! i have actly read two such books..one was “how to..” Dale Carnegie and “the 7 habits…” Stephen r. Covey…though i never completed reading them 😉 as is with me and books….

    paulo is good both(the only two i read) alchemist and 11 minutes vr amazing!..

    and u’ve wrtn so much abt ur new place, evn i want to c it now…:)

    aur haan..tu ye book zaroor padhiyo
    “Chocolate, Chocolate: A Gift of the Gods by Reba Ann Karp ” 😉

  • MeMyself_n_I

    (October 11, 2007 - 7:46 pm)

    phew thank god. finally i know of someone else who dislikes paulo celho. 😀

    and yay for you! new house n all. enjoy. 🙂

  • diyadear

    (October 11, 2007 - 10:08 pm)

    congrats on ur new house.. n its gr8 that u r not in need of self help books.. stay do my friend 🙂

  • Spectator

    (October 12, 2007 - 3:58 am)

    even i hate this help-urself sorta books… infact, i hate reading any four pages in a row written by the same author…!!! the author always leaves a mark on the reader’s mind.. infact, he forces his thoughts onto reader’s mind… i have my own thinking and my own adarsh , thank you very much !!!

    /* btw, i’ve read both – Who Moved My Cheese & I Moved Your Cheese 😀 */

  • Spectator

    (October 12, 2007 - 4:00 am)

    and i really loved a book by Edward De Bono – I Am Right You Are Wrong

  • Kenny

    (October 12, 2007 - 5:01 am)

    Self-help books..well, they never helped me n i’m glad to know i’m not the only one…was getting sick of hearing how amzing these books are!! 🙂

    n the new place sound pretty cool..enjoy!!! 😀

  • Longroads

    (October 12, 2007 - 5:45 am)

    and yes…how’s the new house?

  • myflipflops

    (October 12, 2007 - 5:50 am)

    Whhooa! Thank gos I got sumone who hates them, like I do. Very good post, with your signature style ofcourse.

  • Sam

    (October 12, 2007 - 7:24 am)

    OMG, I can soooo relate to you here..
    -I have friends who dote on self help books and Paulo Coelhos and I just can’t seem to understand them!!
    -For me, books are either “very good” or “very bad”, never okie..
    – I too liked Eleven Minutes a lot, tried reading other stuff by him but gave up after a few pages of crappy lectures and realisations which are NEVER true!! And people call me shallow..huh!!
    -Am mostly a Fiction person with a bit of autobiographies like Lee Iacoca etc.
    Congrats on your new house,the location must be awesome!! 🙂

  • Adi Crazy

    (October 12, 2007 - 7:39 am)

    Anon: and I dont like anon comments.
    Thanks anyway. 🙂

    Pritha: lol. Thanks!

    Raaji: Oops! was this “disrespectful” in any way? But then, as u said, we all work differently and this stuff doesn’t work for me at all. I’ve heard it works for most of the normal ppl, so its okay – I nvr said I was normal! 🙂

    Blue Coffee Mug: HAHAHAHA
    I know what you mean. I loved 11 minutes. And you can come to my house only if you promise to take wonderful pictures like you do. 🙂

    PS: AM I getting the Chocolate book as a gift? My birthday’s cuming in Feb. 😀

    Me Myself n I: THANKGAWD! Like someone once said “great people think alike”
    Take a bow. 🙂

    Diya Dear: 🙂 Thanks! I plan to clear my mess this weekend and then my house will be a better one. 😀

  • Ashu

    (October 12, 2007 - 9:46 am)

    Adi. The self help books help noone but authors. i tried many books thinking i would really be benefited, but i just couldnt finish tem off.

    The most hyped book i came across which was high on package and low in content was Alchemist from Paulo Cohello. How crap. What dreams ? It seemed like those crappy Ali Baba serials which came on DD on sundays…………Yuck!!!!!!!!

    Great to find u in new house. u managed to find it though in crazy way…………


  • Ashu

    (October 12, 2007 - 9:49 am)

    And yes i got into this Cohello mess after this 11 minutes stuff. good book. i got his 2 more books that witch thing and zephyr. dint start zephyr, but witch book turned me offf.

    i wow never to buy any Cohello book again.

  • Constantly Crazy

    (October 12, 2007 - 3:51 pm)

    I dislike him too. Dont know what crap he writes and dont know who goes and buys them. Maybe I’m more of a speed and action person, but i hate such books.

    Apologies to people who like-love-adore him. This is a purely personal view.

    (I know many wud overreact on this statement but it is not their fault really, it is the writers they are reading.)


    Cool post Adi!

  • novemberrains

    (October 12, 2007 - 3:53 pm)

    Wow! at last some one who is not afraid to say he/she hates Coelho. Bravo!

    And I agree.


  • ♥busy_writer♥

    (October 12, 2007 - 6:01 pm)

    hehe, im not into self-help books either! i’ve read abt 2 tho, won them in some competition in school.. aaargh, can you beat the prize? sheesh, i wudnt have participated if i’d knwn! nyway.. got sum “how 2 develop a winnin personality” book. shiit, i’f i’d followed those stupid tips, i’d have turned into a dork! lolz.
    nyway, nice post.. funny one! 🙂

  • bluecoffemug

    (October 13, 2007 - 4:08 am)

    sure…thts a promise…m sending some to you on ur mail, do check them……

    P.S – GIft N ‘U’ “in yr dreams”

  • crazyBugga

    (October 13, 2007 - 9:42 am)

    wat about “the monk who shagged himself”? is tat in ur collection too? [:P]

  • reckless_soul

    (October 13, 2007 - 9:47 am)

    nice Adi!

  • start_now

    (October 13, 2007 - 12:54 pm)

    Good going!

  • pia

    (October 14, 2007 - 1:02 pm)

    A good blog you have here girl I liked it a lot and enjoyed reading each post. 🙂

  • Shivoham

    (October 14, 2007 - 4:31 pm)

    Hmmm…35+ comments thats cool..
    I hate non-fiction… Period.
    Self Help Books.. What is that ?? HATE IT.

    Do you by anychance pay them to comment?

    I have only one loyal customer who religiously comments.

    Congrats!! Njoy.

  • Adi Crazy

    (October 15, 2007 - 1:43 pm)

    Ashu: Ali Baba Serials…HAHAHAH. You are right!! lol
    I have the Zephyr book thing too, I’m thinking to gift it to someone 😛

    Yeah, I found a new house and it is really nice. I think you should come over for coffee some time. 🙂

    Constantly Crazy: lolzzzz
    *take a bow*

    November Rains: Thanks! I am known to be crazy 😛

    Busy Writer: hahaha…right. If we follow the tips they give , we’ll be called idiots 😛
    Thanks alot sweeti 🙂

    Blue Coffee Mug: 😛 My chocolates?

  • Adi Crazy

    (October 15, 2007 - 2:25 pm)

    Crazy Bugga: Well, Thankgod I dont have that one!

    Reckless Soul: Thanks a ton pal!

    Start Now: yo! Thanyouzzzz 🙂

    Pia: Thanks! *cute smile* Keep visiting!

    Shivoham: Bingo! I hate em too.

    lolzz…No I dont pay them, but maybe I could – that’s a nice idea 😉

  • raashi07

    (October 16, 2007 - 9:06 am)

    A great blog Adi Crazy! I am your fan 🙂

  • raashi07

    (October 16, 2007 - 9:07 am)

    And yes, I hate these books too. Only fiction or biograpgies for me.

  • Anonymous

    (October 18, 2007 - 10:37 am)

    This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  • Anonymous

    (October 18, 2007 - 10:47 am)

    This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  • Ajit

    (October 19, 2007 - 5:33 am)

    I would like to read “7 Steps to Fearless Freaking”

    no seriously, do you charge for shipping also?

  • Standbymind

    (October 22, 2007 - 5:39 am)

    Now I am laughing..Understanding laugh!

    Oh man..few of those books and u know it all..

    Congrats on the new house..
    I would like to drop by to read those titles;
    and I would like to discuss..how we can become the GURUS…writing one shit book like that..n earning $$$$$.

    (mmmm..waiting for formal invitation ;)…)

  • A

    (October 22, 2007 - 5:40 am)

    when is ur new post coming on ? By the way you have been awarded. Pls check my blog. Pls accept it.

    Cheers :))


  • Sri Tatsat Mishra

    (October 22, 2007 - 5:40 am)

    arre.. I have am yet to give a serious wala review !! Will do it tomorrow-Not in campus=no free internet access !! 😛

  • Sri Tatsat Mishra

    (October 22, 2007 - 5:40 am)

    Ohh..I apologize for that comment there on the last post..But, am sure you would hate if I would stop being honest.Also,you are free to give a negative review on my posts.I would appreciate it.Monotonocity of any kind–be it in terms of “positivity” ,does not help us in improving the quality of our work…Apologies once again- you always know I adore your way of communication !!

  • GaufireSpeaks

    (October 22, 2007 - 9:47 am)

    hiii adi..
    Dammn!!!yet another oohhhsum hilarious post…neways me too hate these alchemist n monk who sold types books..but mind you they are the perfect sleep inducers when u feeling bored or when u r travelling…..neways may i know how cum u cum up with those exact statistics ie 94% n 68.8% n rest 31.2%[hmm…ma math is good..u c!!!:P]…
    alryte keep the good work goin..tc..adios..

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